How do I get a technophobic boss to buy computers?

Dear Aunty B,

I have a CEO who is a technical dill. She barely has any idea how to turn on her computer and we are constantly battling to try to teach her the basics.

In fact, it is hard to imagine anyone else being so bad at it, although she is obviously challenged as she also has trouble opening things and usually stabs them with a knife.

So here is the problem, Aunty. We urgently need upgrades in lots of areas. People need faster broadband, better computers and we need to upgrade servers and the email system. But this is last on her list of priorities because other things matter more.

How do we get her to see that it does matter and when it all fails she will be sorry.

Andrew

Melbourne

Dear Andrew,

You are not writing from the corner of our office are you? That’s not you over there in the mess of cardboard boxes and plastic wrapping? Good. I am not quite that bad.

Look, the only way to get through is to talk money. Paint the picture. Send her a power point and call it “The case for a new server”.

• Slide 1: The servers are at XX capacity (insert graph), and show her what a server looks like and what it does in easy to understand sentences.
• Slide 2: If the servers get to YY capacity, the site will go down.
• Slide 3: Likelihood servers will crash at some time in the next month: 100%
• Slide 4: When a customer comes to the website to buy something, this is what they will see: (insert stupid message)
• Slide 5: This is how long it will take to buy and set up servers: XX while customers are still looking at this, XXX.
• Slide 6: This is the estimated cost to the business in:
  
  • Lost sales: $XXX
  • In frustrated staff: XXX
    
  • In you yelling at us: XXX
• Slide 7: This is how much is needed to get a new server: $XXX
• Slide 8: These are the benefits of the new server (allow for growth, faster uploading, etc)
• Slide 9: This is the return on investment: $XXX

I would leave a little time before all the slide shows but that should do it.

Be smart,

Your Aunty B